Better

And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons: "My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline, and do not lose heart when he rebukes you, because the Lord disciplines those he loves, and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son." Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father?

~Hebrews 12:5-7

I remember growing up and hearing adults often say, “I want my kid(s) to have it better than I did as a kid.” A statement filled with good intentions but unfortunately it can, if taken too far, have a very negative impact on young people.

First of all, due to technology and other advances kids really can't help but have it better than their parents, in some aspects. What this statement often means is the removal of some or all hardships from a child or teenager's life. Which in turn ill-equips young people to deal with problems that they will inevitably face.

I know I'm a big hypocrite because I have reaped many benefits by my mother's and other's hard labor. I have a nice cushy job teaching namely because of the hardships I've seen my mother face. I was on the other hand at least told “no” from time to time and had to work from the time I was 15. I appreciate my mother, who demanded me to get a job or face the alternative of “no car.” Why? Well because it helped me to make decisions about what was really important to me and it taught me how to balance work, school and extracurricular activities. It also taught me about contentment and the desire to better myself. I know those sound like polar opposites but a good understanding of where you should be and how to get better the “right way,” is healthy.

Another learning experience my mother forced on me was working for my hometown gas department one summer during my college career. I spent the summer digging ditches and hearing some of the most awful jokes you can imagine. My Christianity was tested everyday. Most of you may be thinking, ‘how could a mother put her son in such an awkward situation.’ Well, take it from me, there are several benefits. First of all, I came out of that summer more determined than ever to get a college degree. Second, I learned how to deal with those I don't see “eye to eye” with even if they are louder than me (yeah it's possible). Third, it re-confirmed there is great benefit in hard labor. I came home worn out everyday and it felt great!

I can't see God making the “I want my kids to have it better” statement because He's already given us the best (Ephesians 2:1-9)! If you are like me it's really easy to lose sight of that fact. Remembering what He has already done for us with the possibility of rejection, helps me remember the passage from Hebrews 12:5-7. I like how in verse seven it basically defines the parent/child relationship by the discipline aspect. Now I'm not coming out in favor of the constant belittling of a child or “fathers provoking children to wrath” but a good healthy, loving parent/child relationship is outlined with great communication and discipline!

Now, please pray for me to remember this article when my time comes as a parent.